Skydekkerix

Facebook games. Thank you to my friend for hijacking what should have been a beautiful first stage of my journey into the internet and careening it into the realms of the retarded. I played Vampire Wars when I started up on FB because I didn’t realise how incredibly annoying it was to all of my ex-friends who I deleted because I didn’t like them. Basically you earned points by clicking a button and they would get a notification saying that I bit them. I only realised how retarded this was after three hours. That’s three hours I could have spent… not doing that. I never did anything that retarded again, and anyone who knows me knows how big a call that is.

Facebook poker is shit. I like poker, I love poker. It is my wife. FB poker is not poker. It is a place where eight people with too many consonants in their name and blank profile pictures sit around and hit the call button until someone runs out of money. Usually me.

Farmville. I don’t know what that is. My little brother played it at some point. Or it might have been Frontierville. Or Fishville.

I played some retarded RPG, which actually didn’t really count as an RPG as all you had to do was get enough friends playing to get an item so you could progress to the next area. I don’t even think it had graphics. It was like a machine meant to bore you to death, fuelled by the destruction of your loose friendships that you worked so hard to get because you are not good at connecting with people.

I don’t know if Facebook games have progressed beyond this. I don’t even know what the makers of these games get out of it. Is there a prize for making peoples lives slightly more shitty? I will (not) find this out some day.

By the way I’m not usually going to rant like this on my posts but I got hijacked and these things do my nerves up wretched.

Anyway how are you?

(First commenter gets to steer my brain in another even more stupid direction tomorrow.)