I done promised ya’ll I’d keep posting my stupid little stories so you can make fun of me again and I am a man of some of my words. I used to be a real tortured writer, and have to squeeze the words outta me like a dehydrated, no-poop-for-two-days roast dinner dump, but now I am a lot more things (day job, 18 month old, regular household chore doer) I find writing is like the best thing I can do. I can’t pretend this job is miserable no more, so in the interest of not appearing a wanker here another one that I had a lotta fun writing:
Baleful Polymorph
A new leaf, that’s what Frendrick decided in that moment of peace and wind and loud silence. The experiment had worked to some degree, and he was sure the university would be very interested in his findings, but suddenly none of that seemed important. If suddenly was the right word for how he felt, now maybe a better term, for now seemed so much more important than before, when after had consumed him. He scratched his arse with a giant hairy paw.
The bustling university district stretched out from his perch on the balcony of his penthouse suite in the transmuters’ tower. Magic potions and crystals were strewn across the floor, and the laboratory behind him was scorched purple. His new muzzle was aflame in the smell of his experiment, and with the soup of city fumes. Getting away seemed the only choice, somewhere with fresh air.
Hunger pulled at his stomach like a toddler trying to grab something forbidden from a parent’s hand. He considered going to the market, but the logistics overwhelmed him. Besides the fact that the strap of his purse wouldn’t fit over his beefy ursine shoulders, counting coins without opposable thumbs would be next to impossible, and furthermore he was quite sure he’d forgotten how to count.
No, a brisk exit from the city would have to do. Find a beehive, some berries and game and sate himself, then a long nap. His nose would lead the way. Science and wizardry be damned. It seemed so childish now, when dwarfed by the desire for feast and rest. He would go, but first there was the holy experience of sun and breeze to revel in. To ponder the universe and its bounty. The roar of silence and the ache of the biggest question there’d ever been.
What was he going to have for breakfast?
Skydekkerix 